So far, the top ten Google searches of 2011 are pretty boring and unsurprising. What is surprising is how fucking stupid some people must be to search for them. Anyway, for no other reason but for getting more hits on my site I’ve written some haiku for each term. Go me.
1. Facebook
Broke up with girlfriend
Google search for emo song
Must update status
2. How To
I’m searching Google
Can’t find how to do something
Try adding a verb, dickhead
3. You
Search for “you” online
Who do you mean? Them or you?
Jesus what the fuck?
4. YouTube
Funny dog! Haha
It’s singing to death metal
lol *share* *Facebook* *Tweet*
5. Lyrics
Broke up with girlfriend
Change status to lyrics from
Shit eclectic band
6. Yahoo
You do realise
No one uses Yahoo, right?
OK, just checking.
7. Google
Googling Google
It doesn’t make sense, does it?
Stop it you fuckwit.
8. Games
You mean like X Box?
Or the relationship kind?
I’m shithouse at both
9. Craigslist
My best feature: Eyes
Because you’re old and fat
Include blurred photo
10. Weather
Searching for weather
Need something to talk about
At water cooler
I’m proud to say I contributed to searching for the weather via google